It only took me about 17 years.

TL;DR I’m not dying, I had plastic surgery done to my chest to remove swelling.

About a month ago I decided to have surgery done on my chest. I have something that many guys silently hide, including myself for many years, and it’s called gynecomastia (hormone imbalance that causes swelling, it was a side effect from taking Adderall/Ritalin when I was young). It’s not any sort of disease but it has made me extremely hesitant to do certain things in my life.

I’ve had it since I was about 13 and have done numerous, ridiculous, things to hide it from others. I would duct tape my chest, wear baggy clothes, only wear black, wear undershirts… and then there’s stuff I chose not to do.

For example, I would have likely gone towards playing sports (possibly professional) or I would have joined the military. But I was too self-conscious of my chest and didn’t want to take my shirt off in front of others. I even nearly failed high school because I wouldn’t change into my school’s white t-shirt for gym.

When people have found out, they’ve never really cared much… but I did. I had thoughts in my head that I just couldn’t get rid of. Over the last year, I’ve come more at peace with it but I still didn’t like the sight of it.

Anyhow, I’ve come to realize over the years that MANY men actually have gynecomastia but don’t talk about it or have no one to talk to. Many have reached out to me in fear for their mental health, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, relationships, bullying, and various other reasons. I chose to push myself to my limits with fitness this past year in hopes I could get rid of it. Although I could see improvements, the surgery was what I ultimately opted for. If you have or know someone with it feel free to have them reach out to me.

I’m really excited to see how my chest looks in 3 to 6 weeks. I already feel more confident and masculine even without being able to take this vest off until then. I’ve been moving into a whole new chapter of my life where I know what it is what I want and I’m making it happen. Thank you for reading!